[Penny for my thought ]

[Saturday, May 03, 2003]

blogger,
this morning i went to the library to print out all my articles, i spent like $15. i hate mrs ross. arg. then we went to victoria O'Conner's communion party, it was at Café Amore in GWL. it was horrible, EB's friend wanted to do me in the bathroom, and i kinda was edgin away from her to talk to kara, whom i haven't seen in like 2 years, she left all pissed off....i'm sorry for being loyal....oh well. i wish i lived in town so i could hang out with all the townies. marissa and lisa are such little hoes. they're like 13 and they wear these little shirts and are....bustin out. marissa practically raped kevin, poor kid ;-) haha. so yeah, i'm excited, EB kara and stephen scarpy are all coming down the shore this summer. its going to be fun. stephen got cooler, seriously. he's not a weirdo anymore, like he used to be, all obsessive and wimpy like kevin. cool kida. i'm excited. we'll rave. holler. haha yeah right. M is such a hooch. dear lord. so thats it for today, tomorrow i have to write my term paper, then i'm going to rufio :-). only downside is that i won't get to see X-Men 2 until next weekend :-( i'll live. maybe i'll drag kerry out to see that....nah.

mood: content
music: dashboard!!!!!!

---me
[Posted by Stephen] at 9:36 PM

blogger,
i was so tired last night i could not write. yesterday was alright i guess, its kinda fuzzy now. kerry spazzed out because i said "i love you". i guess she didn't realize it wasn't like a "i want to marry you" i love you. its like how you say to your friends i love you, in a not totally serious deep meaningful way? well i just kinda said it like i love her like i do. i mean, i really really like her. i miss her when she's not around and everything. i write her notes in my extra time in class. i'm sad i'm not going to see her till monday. we kiss in front of teachers ;-)
---
tennis yesterday was a huge victory for steve and sean. i drank a gallon of quarter water, and i was ON. oh man, as soon as the ball crossed the net i was all over it. i used my special undefeated raquet. mm hmm. we won 6-3, 4-6, 6-3. the team lost 3-4. jimmy & adrian's match was the deciding point and they lost in a tie breaker. adrian is the most resilliant kid in the world, he killed his ankle and cut up his leg when he fell and finished the match. jimmy is worthless. he can't move, he needs to lose weight in a bad way. so the team is 3-3 so far, which is 1 more win than we had in the whole season last year. boo-yah. only bad thing was that joe niosi broke his foot and is out for the season. boo.
---
today, on the other hand, has been bad. it was a half day, so it was a total waste of a day, plus its friday which means i'm not going to see kerry for 2 whole days :-(. boo! so we're having a tennis match vs. goshen today at 3:00, and it hasn't rained yet so its still on, i can't go, and this sucks alot. sean is going to be pissed. we're going to have to forfeit. great. the only good parts about today were that my dad agreed to let me go to see rufio on sunday night :-) which was totally awesome of him. and the other good part about today was that i love kerry mucho. i'm obsessed with her. its probably not healthy, but i don't care.

mood: missing you :-(
music: foo fighters - everlong

---me
[Posted by Stephen] at 3:05 PM

blogger,
my oh my what a day. first: school. ok, so stupid other melissa knows about kerry and i, and told the cool melissa, and now i feel like poop because i never told her :-(. so yeah. i had like 40 minuites of lunch today. and it was good. i wish i had more lunch with kerry. i really want to hang out with her again, like i have this longing inside me to just be alone with her. it hurts my heart. i kissed her today and i unintentionally dropped the L-bomb, but i don't think i really said it that loud, i just kinda...mouthed it, if you know what i mean ;-) hehe. so this is love...
---
tennis was horrible. sean and I lost 3-6, 1-6. we SO should have won. it was all my fault, i double faulted the last point. i'm so mad at myself. he was pretty mad too. i was soooo tempted to join him in a cigarette after the match. i really was. but i said no. i'm a good kid like that. ;-). haha we stole so much. CJ and i stole a phone receiver from the hotel, (we played at the Nevele) and he also stole a shotput, sean and i stole like 400 tennis balls and a shuffleboard disc and a really long screw. it was really bizzare...we found snow on this hill.....so i made a snowball and when penis knuckle joe marino finished his match i hit him with a snow ball. he SO was not expecting that. he comes off the court all "yeah i won and i'm the best and i'm gods gift to tennis..." so then, "eat THIS bitch!!!" says I. he was totally 0wnzored. yeah man. its supposed to rain tomorrow, and the match will hopefully get cancelled. i am so bad. i haven't been practicing or taking this seriously, and its starting to show. like its getting to the point where i really AM a sad excuse for a tennis player. i hate it. i wish i was better. i can't believe i double faulted and it cost us the match, fuck me.

mood: somewhat peved, but so in love :-) i'm sucha cheeseball
music: jimmy eat world - hear you me

---me
[Posted by Stephen] at 9:03 PM

blogger,
heyy blogger. today was a very good day in all aspects but one. today school went by so quickly you have no idea. i saw kerry more today, i know when and where to look for her in the hallways :-). i think i've finally gotten past the stage where i'm afraid of doing stuff with her. today when we said goodbye, instead of hugging her and making her feel incredibly akward and kissing my cheek, i went for it. i'm so proud of myself. this is the forst girl in steve's dating history thats just been open about kissing whenever wherever. its really cool :-). steve=incredibly happy right now.
---
more thought organization!! i only have like 2 more minuites till smallville, so this will be quick. tennis was a disaster today, sean and i played 1 doubles as usual, but we got creamed. we were so on too. it was sad. we lost 0-6, 0-6; and the team lost 2-5. its alright tho, we're still tied for #1 in section 9. we just need to beat ellenville once and we're golden. sean and i need to win 4 more matches, and i know we can beat o'neill, liberty, and fallsburg. we're going to live forever in burke infamy!!! muahhaha!!!
---
more girls things....chris orengo likes carolyn, carolyn is in love with joe, and he loves her,. i'm happy for them. i don't like chris orengo. boo him. melissa found out about me and kerry, so now i need to talk to her about it i think. oh well. michele confessed her love to me, and i had to confess that i liked her too. i wish i knew how to make a little embarrased face in here like on IM, cuz thats what i feel like now too. i've nothing going for her right now tho, i'm all about kerry. i don't know how long kerry and i will last, but i'm definately not one to cheat, or anything. i'm not like that. i have a hard enough time doing stuff with her, i would explode if the thought even crossed my mind. oh dear. in amy's terminology: "whenever you're going out with someone, theres always that one person you know that if things were different, thats who'd you would be with" i guess if things were different i'd be with michele. who knows. maybe someday i'll meet her i na cafe in NYC and we can chill like woah. that wouldbe amy MCKEIRNAN's terminology.
---
well, i'm missing smallville, so good night blogger.

---me
[Posted by Stephen] at 9:04 PM

blogger,
so today sucked majorly. i saw kerry maybe once. i hate this so much. tennis match today vs. liberty. sean and i had our first defeat at first singles. we lost 5-7, 3-6. i played like fucking garbage. i couldn't concentrate at all. the team won tho, 5-2. i had such bad ADD attacks today its not even funny. i was all over the place. today was horrible. i accomplished nothing today. i'm so pissed right now. i just want to kill something, seriously. oh and to top it off, i missed everwood. dammit. today needs to end right now.

---me
[Posted by Stephen] at 9:34 PM

blogger,
so today has finally come to a close. i need to go pack my stuff up for school tomorrow. jim told me we're scheduled for 5 tennis matches this week. no fucking way. tomorrow we go to liberty. i don't know what the other ones are, but he said goshen. i'll let you know when we play goshen michele, so you can come cheer me on...or spit at me. either one. i don't care. i'm so ready for summer. i just want to go to the shore. someone needs to open their pool, i want to swim. i don't know what i'm going to do about kerry. i'm so stressed out, and i dont want that. i need to go pack up for school tomorrow. good nite.

mood: frazzled
music: saves the day - all i'm losing is me

---me
[Posted by Stephen] at 9:02 PM

blogger,
another looong day. blah. this is so not cool. i did all my english note cards. it only took about an hour. i'm not going to even start global or spanish, they arent due till tuesday and they're easy. i'm kinda looking foward to tomorrow, i'll get to see kerry. this stinks majorly. i was just really bummed about this whole situation today. i'm not in a good mood. i'm so glad michele is back from florida, IM is so boring wthout her, seriously. nobody else is cool. ug. i'm bored and irritated right now. my family has shunned me today. i need to get my permit soon. i want out of here. someone called in the middle of the night and i couldnt get back to sleep. i'm going to go have some cold pizza and maybe sleep some. who knows.

mood: blah :-(
music: rufio - in my eyes (acoustic)

---me
[Posted by Stephen] at 6:01 PM