[Penny for my thought ]

[Saturday, July 12, 2003]

Blogger,
Well I haven't updated since yesterday morning. I'm such a Blogger addict. So yesterday I played baseball outside with the neighborhood kids. They're such punk asses. Last night my network went down. the first defeat in my war on technology. So, I isolated the cause; the cable provided by warwick online sucks. So, I called and complained, and today they rushed a technician over, and he fixed it all up, free of charge. All's well that ends well. So as of today, the network is up. The only thing I have left to do is wire the old computer into it. that will be easy, but I don't have to do it till Saturday, because that's when Kevin comes home from camp. Today Dad, Kevin and I went to the mall. We saw League of Extraordinary Gentlemen. If you don't want to know anything about it stop reading right here. It was such a good movie. It gets 1 rank below "perfect" because they messed up on the vampire aspect. first of all, she goes out in the sun. Second, she goes in a boat. According to the legend, vampires cannot be transported over water unless they're in a coffin. Third, when she gets stabbed through the heart with the sword, it would not have immobilized her, only a wooden stake would do that. Kudos though, on the bats and transformation parts. So I also bought Master Gundam, because I've been looking for it for almost a year, and I finally found it. I bought The Glass Menagerie, which I have to read for school, and I ordered Tooth and Nail, Mercadian Masques, and Lucky Wander Boy. the latter two are for leisure reading. So I'm pretty much done for now. Joe's coming over tomorrow. Danielle comes home tomorrow night. I've been without Danielle for too long. I miss her. So I'm off to bed now. Good night all.

Mood: Lighter.
Music: Metallica: One.

---Me
[Posted by Stephen] at 10:40 PM

Blogger,
Upon request by Erin "Cooler than Ice Cream" Yates, here is an early entry. The party last night was a really good time. I love Cassie so much, she's the best. "Ah!! I forgot to kiss him!! I knew I forgot to do something!!" Only her. Erin loved the LBI hoodie I got her. She's so cool. Ice cream has nothing on her. It was also the first time I got to see Michele in person since...ever. The big inflatable slide really made my day. So I guess the good and bad of yesterday averaged it out into an 'OK' day. Today started out really good, however. Kevin had to go get teeth pulled, and both my parents went with him, so I have the house to myself finally. I'm going to once again attempt to install this network shit today. If it doesn't work I'm just going to say fuck it and send it all back for a refund. Danielle is going to Rhode Island this weekend. My scooter has been collecting dust for almost two weeks now. Bah. Ok, time to attempt once again to hook this shit up. Wish me luck.

---Me
[Posted by Stephen] at 12:25 PM

Blogger,
I give up. This is so stupid, I can't stand to be around these stupid people anymore. Yes, my parents are now divorced, but they can't freaking get away from eachother. Why my mom keeps coming back here I don't know. I wish she would go away and not come back. My dad hates her so much now, and I don't blame him. She's being a bitch. They got in a fight over me today, and what I'm going to do with my life. I love how I have any say in anything at all here. Hello, I'm Stephen, I only live here. Mom wants me to stay here the whole summer, so she can go do whatever the fuck it is that she does these days. Dad wants me to go with her because he apparently doesn't trust me to be home alone anymore. Why, I will never know. In my entire life, I've never done anything horrendously wrong that it had any severs consequences. Why neither of them trust me at all, I can't understand. All I want to do this summer is chill out. last school year was hectic, and I know for a fact that this one coming is going to be twice as bad. I have the whole "Junior year determines the ret of your life" thing hanging over my head, I'm going to start driving, which is really a scary thing for me, I'm going to have to take these stupid SAT's, I didn't get into and honors classes save for Chemistry, which means I have to work twice as hard to ensure that I get into honors for senior year, and if my grades aren't satisfactory, I know I'll be finishing highschool at Seward, and if that happens, I'm going to cry and hate the world forever. There is so much I have to do over the summer, and most of it depends heavily on my being able to work at this computer, and be alone, and it be quiet. In otherwords I need to be away from Kevin and my stupid mother. I'd really like to write this book, and get it finished by the end of the summer. I made a promise to myself that I'd either finish my to do list before the end of the summer, or die trying. As it is right now, I feel a complete charachter shift coming on. I can't bare to be around these people anymore, I want to just scream. I'm such a fucking pacifist, and I can't tell them, and I can't do anything about it. I hate myself, and I hate what I've become. I'm such a pussy. Fuck emo. I wish I wasn't such a fucking sociopath; I have no one to run away with. And fuck you if you're going to say "I'll run away with you" because you can't begin to empathise with me. I won't fucking let you. I seriously want to go kill something right now, you have no idea. Happy fucking birthday. I hate you.

Cut my life into pieces
This is my last resort

---Me
[Posted by Stephen] at 3:23 PM

Blogger,
I put up the entries I wrote on the Axim while I was at LBI. You can read them here. So this morning, I failed at attempt #1 so instal the wireless network thing. It was only a half-hearted effort though, it was at 6:00 am, and I was crazed. i'm going to put it in later today though. I don't really have much to do today besides that. Tonight is Erin and Cassie's party, about which I'm pretty excited. I haven't seen them in a long time. Right now my parents are at the lawyers doing whatever. I don't know. I'm going to give this network thing another shot.

---Me
[Posted by Stephen] at 11:48 AM

Blogger,
Hey! I'm back! So it was a weird week, to say the least. Basically, I worked from 10-4 every day, went to the beach once, found it way too crowded to be of any enjoyment, and sat around in the rediculous heat not liking my mother. I wrote daily entries in my Axim, and I'm going to be putting them up on the site here tomorrow most likely. Right now though, I need to get some sleep. My room is a project to say the least, and I've much to do. Tomorow I'll be hanging out with my most favorite neighbor, Danielle, and then tomorrow night is Catherine and Erin's birthday party. Bah. So much to do. Good Night.

---Me
[Posted by Stephen] at 10:09 PM